40 Acts of Kindness- Giving Back instead of Up

Ok so I know I said that my next post would be about actually balancing the mayhem of Mommyhood- but this idea just came to me last night and since Lent is starting today I feel that I need to post this today. 

Lent is beginning today- Lent the 40 day period before Easter Sunday- traditionally Catholics give something up during this period.  It signifies the 40 day fasting period Jesus experienced while in the dessert before beginning his public ministry. (thanks for the summary Wikipedia).

I personally always struggle to find something to give-up and I never really found it rewarding to so this year I am trying something new.  Instead of giving something up I am going to give back- with 40 acts of kindness. For me this is a more positive spin on Lent and hopefully by putting positive energy and goodness into the world it will help make it a little better and make a few people smile along the way.

Now the goal would be to do one act a day- but I know that may not happen so as along as all of them are accomplished before Easter- I say it counts.

I'm writing this entry as a way to make myself accountable to accomplishing this goal and as just a way to track the acts.  Also this is just going to be my list to work off of.

Here my list of acts of kindness- obviously there are only 20- so some of them I'm going to do more than once but I will complete each act at least one time in the next 40 days.

1. Clean up litter
2. Bring flowers to a friend
3. Compliment someone
4. Make dinner for a friend 
5. Donate food to a food drive/pantry
6. Make a donation to a charity
7. Leave a generous tip
8. Let someone go in front of you in line
9. Hold the door for someone
10. Write a letter to a friend
11. Bring Co-workers a special treat
12. Buy someone's lunch
13. Donate used clothing
14. Plant a tree/flowers
15. Be an active listener to someone who needs to talk
16. Give a Thank you note
17. Donate blood
18. Make breakfast for my husband 
19. Say "Good Morning" and smile 
20. Thank and praise a co-worker for their good work

My hope is that by completing this kindness challenge I will be setting and being an example for my son and in the future we can do this together. Wish me luck!  I will be posting updates as I complete each act! 

Back to work....

Ok after this post I'll be more fun... these last couple of posts have been more just my thoughts and story... but I promise the next one I'll talk about useful planning tips, and perhaps I'll feature a Crock Pot recipe! :) 

I've been back to work now for about three weeks. It's been a hard adjustment.

I have been on maternity leave since mid-November and working part-time since January. In this time I have been a little spoiled by making my own schedule- grocery shopping in the middle of the day, sleeping in a little bit a few days a week, and not having to be too strict on my own bed time.  It's been an adjustment becoming a mom but it's also allowed me to refocus my energy and get out of the hustle and bustle of my work life.

However that being said, I like being at work and the projects I am working on.  It's a challenge, it's rewarding to create presentations and deals, and to just be successful at work.  Being around co-workers and other adults is also really nice- just the contact with other people is something I missed on the days I was at home alone while my husband worked. (I'm definitely a people person- and go a little crazy when I spend too much time cooped up at home).  And of course its nice to hear that I was missed at the office while on maternity leave.

But I miss my little man and I miss my time at home.

I know some people have told me "You will be so ready to go back to work and get out of the house"- I am not one of those people.  I didn't mind staying at home- I found plenty to do and found it rewarding to be a homemaker and take care of my family.

Now I find that I am trying to do both and it is challenging; I see that it can be done, I guess the real question is do I want to do it.

I have the utmost respect for stay at home mom's- it really was a challenge some days trying to get it all done especially if my little guy was particularly fussy.  But I also have a lot of respect for women who go back to work- it's hard!  I want to be both places at once but unfortunately I do not have the Harry Potter Time Turner- so I'm stuck trying to balance it all in 24 hours day.

What I am finding is- I want to stay in touch, go out and spend time with my friends but when I am working 5 days a week until 4-5pm- I don't really feel like going out afterwards- I've got to spend that evening getting ready for the next work day.  And my weekends are my time with my little guy, I'm not really willing to give that up and get a babysitter- I know I can bring him along to some places but sometimes I feel it's just easier to stay home. I see now why some people loose touch after having a baby- but I am going to try my hardest to not have that happen to me.

I'm hoping that my family and I get into more of a routine, and I hope my little man doesn't miss me too much (though I'm sure I miss him more than he misses me)- I know he is well cared for with family helping out and so far just daycare once a week.

I guess what it boils down to is I just want to make sure that he sees and spends the most time with me.  As his mom I should be the biggest influence and presence in his life and I don't want to loose that by working full time.

We will see how this all shakes out- I'm a pretty stubborn person and I don't give up on anything too easily so I know somehow we will manage and will create a system that works for our family. We are only three weeks in... we just need to keep moving forward and taking it day by day (but still plan for dinners a week at a time :)

J.S.

Body Issues.

Ok so I am going to go ahead and try to tackle a sensitive and tricky subject..... body issues after pregnancy.

Let me preface this by saying I am judging no one and I do not have a stance on anything- these are just my thoughts based on my pregnancy, experience and feelings.  I am also not looking for a pity party or anything of the sort.  If anything I am just sharing my experience in hopes that it gives some reassurance to others who may be feeling or have felt the same way.

So let's just start by saying- before my wedding in October 2012, I worked really hard to get myself to a place where I was happy with my body- I felt good, energized, healthy and happy!  I had been running and eating healthier well-balanced meals. I honestly do not know how much weight I lost- I never stood on a scale- I just knew I felt better as a whole.

Now I said after my wedding I was going to keep up my running schedule- but I am not someone who runs on a treadmill- I need to be outside, listening to music, feeling the breeze.  (I will be the person that falls off a treadmill).  I could come up with an excuse as to why I did not keep running, the time changed it was dark earlier, it was winter and cold, it was the holidays.  Honestly, it was a combination of everything but the results are the same I did not keep my promise and started putting back on some weight. Then last March I found out I was pregnant so 9 months and a baby later- I'm back to where I started!

One of the few pictures of me pregnant.

When I found out I was pregnant I was excited we had been trying for a few months- but I would not say I was someone who loved being pregnant.  From the very beginning I just didn't feel like myself- I was tired and cranky, my hormones made me cry at the drop of a hat and then be furious a second later. I just felt- not right.

I did not like strangers commenting on my pregnant belly- "When are you due?" "Are you having a boy or a girl?" "Wow, you look like your ready to pop!" "Your feet are so swollen!"- Thanks, I know all of this!

I know all these comments were not made with any intent to upset me- but when you already feel off - they are draining.  I just wanted to say- I don't know you random cashier/waitress/person walking in the mall- I'm never going to see you again and frankly none of this is any of your business.  Of course as a "glowing" pregnant woman- that response is not acceptable- so you just smile and answer politely.

My entire pregnancy I tried to be healthy- I was very good about eating plenty of fruits and veggies, no caffeine, eating all my meals. But let's be honest I had a sweet tooth before I was pregnant and being pregnant I did indulge in my fair share of sweet treats! (mostly ice cream- so I feel like we can count that as dairy- right!).

Throughout my pregnancy I believe I gained about 50lbs- I was right on track until the last few weeks-when, holy cow, I just gained a ton of water weight.  In a two week period I gained 14lbs- I left the appointment feeling GINORMOUS- I mean how is that even possible! (My son did come about three weeks early- so I guess my body was just preparing with lots of extra water weight very quickly!)

Right after I delivered I lost a bunch of weight- that was FUN!  (I don't know exact numbers- I'm not a fan of scales- I just want to feel good and back to my normal self).  I was planning on breastfeeding, which helps you loose the baby weight- and I did for about 7 weeks but it honestly was just not working out for me and it was making me miserable (and an unhealthy/unhappy mom can not be a good mom or wife).  Since I have stopped breastfeeding I have also stopped loosing weight.

I am ready and wanting to get back into my wedding day shape. But I also have a whole new set of priorities in my life and my son is number one.  While my wanting to exercise and loose weight is important, I feel it is more important for me to spend quality time with my son at home after work.  I want to snuggle with him, play with him and just be with him.  He is my number one focus and time with him takes precedence over everything else in my life.

We are starting a healthier lifestyle as a family- which means eating at home more, making healthy sweet treats that include a lot of fruit, and choosing healthier snacks. I can already tell a difference in just the way I feel- I'm starting to feel better- which is really my goal. And as soon as this dreadfully long winter breaks we will be out in the stroller walking and running.

I am determined to get back to feeling as healthy and happy with my appearance as I did on my wedding day- and while the road to get there may be a little longer- it will be filled with fun active memories with my son and family.


JS

Renovated and Reloaded- Mommy Style!

It's been several months since I have updated and what a couple of months it has been!!  Never has my life completely and utterly changed so quickly- one night and WOAH it's all new!

My husband and I welcomed our son into our family on November 14th- immediately we were in love. It's the type of love that even though you just met this little baby you know you always have and always will love him! He is precious and perfect and I am sure will never do anything wrong and will probably rule the world one day. (maybe that's just my "mommy bias")

It's been challenging- but the best, most rewarding kind of challenging- and even being sleep deprived, spit-up, peed and pooped on all in one day- it's been the best time of my life!  I have had my fair share of breakdowns and freak-outs, but hey my hormones are working their way back to some level of normalcy.  It's overwhelming; I have to plan my potty breaks and shower according to little man's schedule, to leave the house I feel like I bring 90% of everything we own!

Now at almost three months old (I can't believe it) we are working into some sort of routine.  It is an indescribable feeling to look into our baby's eyes and see my parts of my husband and myself looking back. He really looks more like his dad right now- but I have realized that when he stretches out waking up or going to sleep it's almost the exact stretches I do when I am tired! Weird and Amazing!

When my maternity leave began (sort of unexpectedly- little man made a surprise arrival 3 weeks early) I felt like I had all the time in the world- but it flew by!  I can't believe that I am going back to work full time in just about a week! I am really not looking forward to this but now that we have this little guy we have to be able to afford him- so it is necessary that I go back to work.  We are lucky to have a very supportive family and that has volunteered to watch him a few days a week so we only have to do daycare part-time- I'm sure daycare days will be the harder days- (I wonder if I can just stay on the phone with the daycare all day so I can just hear him!)

I'm going to try and wrap up this blog post- because I honestly feel like I could just keep writing and I'm not sure anyone would want to keep reading!  But I hope to use this blog to share stories with out of town relatives and it honestly helps me reflect and focus; maybe it can also help other moms to hear another person's story about balancing the mayhem of work and family life. I'll post quick dinner recipes (I intend on becoming a crock-pot queen), fun craft ideas/activities, travel tips, and funny stories!


I feel like my life has been leading up to this like I have a real purpose now.  I have someone that I would literally do anything and everything for; someone I will protect above everything else. I don't know how to describe it accept he is mine.

Thanks for reading- I'll try to post again once I'm back at full-time; that's when the real balancing begins!

JS

It's a Marathon....

Fall is officially in full swing and I love this time of year!  We have been in our house now almost three months and paid two mortgage payments! (358 left to go.... I suppose I need to stop the countdown it will only make me depressed...haha)

One of my favorites from our wedding! 

It's crazy to think that this time last year I was just over two weeks away from marrying my best friend. Now a year later we are homeowners (or mortgage payers) and about two months away from having a baby!  What a year!

Little baby feet!

I am not just over 7 months pregnant and officially in full nesting mode! I just want to get everything set-up and decorated and just perfect for our new addition!  But I know I can't do everything at once... baby steps they say.  Unfortunately, I can't always see that and had a minor pregnancy breakdown the other night just thinking of all the things I wanted to do to the nursery and the house in general.  At the time it was an overwhelming list both from the amount of items on it and just financially.

However, after a good night's rest (as good of night sleep you can get seven months pregnant... which means at least two trips to the bathroom)- the list didn't seem so overwhelming and after a trip to Target I scratched off a few items and I'm feeling good!

I know that we still have time and even after the baby comes we will still have things in our house that we want to work on. I also know that having a perfect home to bring the baby home to is an unrealistic expectation. Life isn't perfect, it's messy and crazy and sometimes the craziest and messiest parts are the best parts about life!

I just need to take it one day (baby steps) at a time and enjoy the ride.  I can't get too caught up in trying to get everything done and checked off my list in one day.... sometimes I just need to sit down take a break and enjoy our home and life!  And I know that one way or another it will all work out because there really isn't another option. Ready or not.. there will be a baby on board this December!  :)

J.S.

Settling In

We have been in our house about a month now- and paid our first mortgage (only 359 more to go)!
I just have to say I am so glad we did not go with a house that needed some work. Our house was pretty much move in ready and we have still found plenty to do! It's been so exciting to set-up rooms and decorate, buy a few new things and really start to make the place feel like our own!

However, it's also been a little overwhelming!  We are trying to be very budget conscious because we have a house now and all the bills that come with it!  But we have had to purchase items we just never had to worry about before- all sorts of landscaping tools, shovels, clippers, a weed-wacker, a saw.  These items were especially frustrating for me to buy because frankly, I do not want to use them- but I can't have our house looking like a jungle either so.... we bought them. We also went from a small apartment to a three bedroom house with a large living area- so we have purchased a chair and an additional sofa. While we got a good deal on both items- it was still a large chunk of change!

We were lucky enough to pay for our down payment and still have some money in savings so most of these expenses have come from money we had put aside for moving- but sometimes it's still hard to spend the money we worked so hard to save!

One thing I have especially enjoyed is having a larger kitchen!  I finally have all the items we received as wedding gifts out of my parents basement and they are now happily being used in our new kitchen! I just have to say you can never have too many Pyrex containers!

Having a larger kitchen has allowed me more space to store food. I am trying to be very diligent about planning our dinners out for the week and then following this plan when grocery shopping each week.  This is helping our budget as well. I have become a Pinterest nut for quick and easy dinners to prepare.  I know I'm only a month in but I am hoping I will just make this a routine each week. So we don't run into what we had at the apartment- there is nothing for dinner, let's just go out.

Now that we are settling into our new place, I feel like this is the new beginning of a new chapter in our lives- dare I say I feel like a grown-up! Maybe part of the reason I feel this way is because on top of buying our first home, we are also expecting our first baby- a little boy due in exactly three months (Sorry, I have been keeping that from you for quite a while).  So I guess it really is time to grow-up and dive right into the land of diapers and milk!

I have to say moving and getting set up our new house has really allowed me to see how we can have a family here, and I am just so excited to be in a place now that gives us the space to raise our family.  It's definitely been a year of change and we are going to be ending with the biggest change of all- a new baby- I am excited and intimidated (I hope we can do this- since it's not just about us anymore) but most of all I just feel so blessed and grateful!

J.S.

Moving on up!

We did it!!  We closed and moved in!! Woohoo!!

The last few weeks have been crazy busy just getting packed and organized and making sure all of our paperwork was in order.  We had a couple  documents we had to re-submit to close, updated bank statements, etc. But we found out about four days before our closing that our loan was cleared and we were officially approved for the mortgage!!  Thank goodness!!

Another part of getting ready to move- aside from the annoying and tedious packing, is moving or applying for electric, water, trash, etc. We already had electric and gas in our name from living in the apartment but I did have to submit a move request form to alert them of our move. I had to sign-up for water and trash service as those items were covered by our apartment previously.  Signing or requesting a move service is not too difficult just make sure you know who is providing the service at your new home.  I discovered both our water and trash bills are going to be combined- which made signing up for them a little easier! :)  Don't forget to move or sign-up for these services, because you definitely want everything right away at your new home!

You also need to set-up a forwarding mail address service from the post-office- letting them know where to send mail addressed to you starting the date you move from your previous address. One other item I forget to address prior to moving was changing our mailing addresses associated with our bank accounts and credit cards.

After all the packing and planning Tuesday July 30th finally arrived and at 9am we were signing paper after paper. About an hour later we had the keys to our first house and a car load of stuff to start unloading!  By July 31st we were all moved in and thanks to friends and family we avoided having to pay our August rent! (Thanks guys!!)

We are now settling in and realizing all the things we need to buy that we didn't have to worry about in our apartment-mainly lawn equipment and tools!  But we do have a lawn mower so we will not be living in a jungle. The rest of the items we will get in time.

I am so excited to be in our new house- I love it! I still can't believe we did it- we bought our first house!!  There is still some unpacking to be done, a few items to buy and definitely some decorating to do- but I am just enjoying being in our very own place!

Now the real adventure begins- caring for and maintaining our home.  Stay tuned- I will update as we experience and uncover adventures of being a first time homeowner.

-JS